Once upon a time, a fellow named Darren sipped a Pure Blonde Naked midstrength and what he tasted was a golden ray of sunshine. In the next sip, the aromatic morning dew of a wildflower petal. Finally, he tasted the first cool day of spring, as if he had been kissed by Mother Nature herself. All of this can be explained in simple brewing terms. What Darren is really tasting are the four essential ingredients of Pure Blonde Naked. The golden ray of sunshine is in fact hops (which, to Darren’s credit, also happen to be gold). The aromatic dew he is confusing with aromatic yeast. Mother Nature’s kiss is nothing more than malted barley and the cool spring morning stuff is simply fresh water, the final ingredient of Pure Blonde Naked. Darren takes another sip. Glorious! It tastes like cool wind. Like the cool wind you feel against your face whilst running barefoot through meadows at dawn. Textbook response, Darren. With no preservatives or additives, Pure Blonde Naked is completely rubbish-free. A clean, premium brew simply can’t be enhanced by faulty beer science. When you brew with the essentials, nothing else needs to be added. Darren thinks about perfection. He concentrates on gold medals and other miscellaneous gold things. He realises that he has waited all his life to taste perfection. Why? Well, Darren, it takes time to brew the perfect beer. And this is our secret – we brew Pure Blonde Naked for longer than your average beer, to deliver a premium low carbohydrate product. You see, the longer brewing process breaks down large complex sugars into simple ones, which are then further broken down by the yeast during fermentation. This extended process ferments more of the natural sugars, resulting in a fresh, clean beer with only one third of the carbs of a standard full strength beer. And 60% less carbs than the average midstrength beer. That’s an Australian first. Darren takes another sip and thinks, ‘I’d kill for a jumbo sausage roll’. Well Darren, you’re only human. ‘Yes, I’m far from perfect. I worship ball sports and when I should be working, I’m really just thinking about fried chicken.’ Good point, Darren. It’s hard to measure up against a beer brewed to such simple perfection. Let’s just say that Pure Blonde Naked is the purest midstrength and that the only impurity, really, is you.
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